A Word From Our Family
Our family's embryo adoption story has spread quite quickly and unexpectedly this week! It is a very strange feeling to wake up and realize that millions of people are suddenly thinking about and talking about your family. While this has added a lot of outside pressures, we are focused on nurturing and caring for our two sweet daughters right now as they are in critical growth and bonding stages of development.
We know there are lots of people who are interested in just learning about embryo adoption for the first time, lots of people who are considering adopting and looking for advice on where to start, and lots of people who would like to connect with us in a different way. We have created a contact form where you can get connected with us and we would love to serve you in any way we can. But please be patient with us in waiting for any responses, because our daughters are our priority right now.
Why Embryos?
It seems that the Lord is working through the circumstances in our life to help more and more people learn about some of the most forgotten and abandoned orphans in our society: frozen embryos. Current estimates are that there are more than 1.5 million children in frozen storage in the United States alone that exist as a side effect of current IVF standards of practice. These are not just frozen eggs, they are fertilized embryos, distinct human individuals. The humanity of frozen embryos is clear both scientifically and Biblically. They are children who are made in the Image of God and deserving of all the same rights and protections that any one of us has.
Adopting African American Daughters
When we chose to adopt our daughters, we knew they were ethnically African American (and yes, we plan to raise them to love that about themselves), however that was by no means the primary reason we adopted them. We just didn't exclude these girls from consideration on the basis of their ethnicity. After evaluating all the factors (our main criteria was "which embryos seem to be the least likely to be adopted by others on the particular list in the particular context we were working with?") they were the ones we chose this time to welcome into our family with open arms. We have adopted and lost other embryos previously, some white and some of yet another ethnicity, never making race or ethnicity a determining factor in our decision.
We are not ignorant to the reality of the terrible oppression and racism towards African Americans in our country. We do not take lightly the responsibility of raising two African American daughters. (We also know we have a lot we must learn about caring for their amazing hair!) We welcome your kind recommendations of helpful resources in making sure they are raised well in all respects. We also know that, while we must be racially aware, our children of all colors should not be judged (positively or negatively) by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
Why We Love Adoption: The Gospel
We love adoption not because it shows that we are "better than" any child we adopt, but quite the opposite: it displays physically in our family our own spiritual identity. WE were abandoned and helpless, hopeless to survive if left to ourselves. In fact, we were not even innocent. We were rebellious against the holy God who created us. We only wanted to serve ourselves. Even our "good works" were just either a show to impress other people and make them think we were righteous or a self-reliant effort to make ourselves feel better about our guilt and sin. Yet God was not fooled: we justly stood condemned to eternal judgment and punishment because we were enemies of the perfect and holy Creator of the universe.
But John 1:12-13 speaks to God's amazing grace towards us as we were hopeless and rebellious that is also extended to all who would believe in Him and come to Him:
John 1:12-13
"But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. (ESV)"
The Scriptures spell this out further that being adopted children of God means that we are FULL members of the family of God, not some "less than" class of child:
Romans 8:16–17
"The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him." (ESV)
But this adoption to be joint heirs with Christ came at a great price that was paid for us:
1 Peter 1:18–19
"...knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot." (ESV)
Jesus laid down His life as our substitute. God in His holiness demanded justice for sin. He was rightly wrathful towards the oppression and wickedness that we have all committed against our neighbor, and the idolatry that we have all committed against Him. But God sent His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to bear our sin and be punished in our place, so that we may be reconciled to God and walk in fellowship with and obedience to Him. Because of His work as the mediator between God and man, we can be justified (declared forgiven of our sin), adopted (welcomed into the family of God), sanctified (living more and more in obedience to God instead of in sin), and glorified (living in God’s presence forever in the New Heavens and the New Earth) all through faith in Jesus Christ.
Come follow Christ today. No matter what sins you are guilty of, He has laid down His own life to purchase redemption for anyone who would depend fully upon Him and trust fully in His promises. Trust in Him, find rest in Him, and learn to follow His Law in obedience out of gratefulness to the God who loves us. Study His Word, the Bible, today and send us a message and we will help point you to some terrific Gospel resources.
Loving As We Have Been Loved
Since we have been loved so much by God, we seek to learn to do the same. We have welcomed these two little girls as our daughters in our home with full rights and inheritance in our legacy. We are so excited about the home we are building and the bright future ahead together. We want to teach them to love the Lord with all their heart and to love their neighbor as themselves, so that they might come to faith in Jesus Christ, the only Savior. And we want to see them learn to sacrifice for others, to give up their lives and wants for the good and service of others, following in the example of their Lord. May we all learn to do this together and so build a better and God-glorifying world together.
Grace and peace to you all through the Lord Jesus Christ.